Don't let the bastards get you down
It's askin' for trouble to stick out your neck
Some people think it's odd that I share so much of myself online. Some people think it's worse than odd.
The thing is, I know that my vulnerability can be weaponized. It’s not a surprise to me when the things I’ve written are misreported and leveraged against me. I have been posting my thoughts online since 1989, and I've experienced fallout from it again and again.
But sharing my stories online has also given me phenomenal opportunities for connection. Like when I wrote a series of tweets about how I felt as a 16 year old girl, watching Kris Kristofferson support Sinead O'Connor after she spoke out against sexual abuse happening in the Catholic church.
When she tried to perform a few weeks later, the audience was booing her so loudly she froze. The organizers of the event told Kristofferson to go get her off the stage. He instead went and stood next to her and said "Don't let the bastards get you down.”
Seeing that happen caused a seismic shift in my brain about who sticks up for whom. I'd never seen anything like it, and nearly 30 years later I decided to tell that story on Twitter.
Those tweets were viewed by millions of people around the world, eventually making their way to Kris Kristofferson himself. Haritha and I were invited to meet him a few months later, so I could tell him in person what it had meant to me as a terrorized teenage girl to see that act of solidarity — and how much comfort it brought me every time I thought of it.
That happened four years ago this week, and my phone just thought I might need the reminder today. Which I did.
Not everything I post online leads to such a once-in-a-lifetime experience. But whenever I crack open my heart and shine a light inside, my inbox fills with messages from others who have felt alone with similar feelings or horrors. To me, that makes it worth the risk, because now neither of us are on our own with it.
So I offer big thanks to everyone who has taken the time to send along kind words to me — either in the last 36 hours, or any time since we've moved here.
My internet friend Lane Moore has written a book about making friends as an adult called You Will Find Your People. It's such a joy to be finding my people here in Port Medway. ♥️
p.s. If you haven’t seen this (or even if you have) it is truly worth watching.